Dear Vaidehi

Dear Vaidehi,

How are you? How is Badri? So, are you guys in Signapore? How's work? How does it feel to live your dream? It's been two long years and I bet you've got alot to tell.

You know what Vaidehi, you are one of the most relatable characters I've met on-screen. You were an unconventional, ambitious young woman who wished to create her own identity. I could literary relate to every emotion you felt. I'm sure most young Indian women could relate to you at some level, especially the part where you were pressurised to get married. Just like you, not all of us see marriage as the ultimate goal in our lives.

Yes, you represent a large majority of us women who're frustrated with this patriarchal society. But the sad part is, not all of us show the same courage as you, to stand up for ourselves and fight for our dreams. Many of us just curse ourselves for been born a girl and unwillingly confirm to patriarchal norms and live an unfulfilling life - just like Urmila. When I met Urmila and got to know her story, I felt really sorry for her and wished so bad that she would break her silence.

Aren't there many Urmilas amongst us, even withiut us noticing them? Women who are very smart, talented and well-educated, yet forced to sacrifice their their dreams and ambitions and confine themselves to the four walls of their homes, just because of their gender. But you were different. You were not willing to give up on yourself inspite of failing once. You're truely a self-made woman, 'cos you boldly went forward with your goals even when nobody understood you or stood by you.

I can imagine the pain you went through when you tried to give up on your long-cherished dreams for the happiness of your loved ones. And I understand that it is this pain that made you run away to save yourself. But, it was a little too bad of you to run away on the day of your wedding. Even though I could totally understand you, I could not help but empatize with Badri who stood with the garland, waiting for you that night. No, I don't mean to judge you or blame you. I know, you must have tried your level best to hold on till the last moment, but couldn't and had no other option but to run away like that. I know you didn't intend to hurt anyone.

I could see how much Badri loved you. And I should admit, I did feel sorry for him. But, you were right when you said that respect is much more important than love in a relationship. However, it's not Badri's fault, you know. Our Indian households inculcate ideologies of gender disparity in the minds of boys and girls from a very young age itself, right? I'm so glad Badri was able to eventually change his perspective, when he realized his mistake. I'm so glad he got drunk on the day of Urmila's pooja and finally opened up to his father. I'm so glad you came back for him and you guys ended up together.

Please don't blame yourself for being selfish. It's ok. I mean, who decides who is being selfish? Where exactly is the line between being selfish and standing up for oneself? Like Badri said, it was good you ran away that night, or else you would have turned out to be yet another victim of patriarchy.

Keep smiling Vaidehi. Today, your family is proud of you, Badri is proud of you. Thank you for showing us that we can reachout and touch the sky irrespective of our gender. And I love you for that. Continue to fly high woman!

Love,
VMR❤
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Film: Badrinath Ki Dulhania (Hindi)
Direction: Shashank khaitan
Production: Dharma Productions
Vaidehi: Alia Bhatt

[Thank you for giving us Vaidehi.]